What’s a Bachelor to do when he’s no longer a bachelor? Ben Higgins is trying to figure that out.
During an appearance on Trista Sutter’s Better Etc. podcast on Tuesday, the former Bachelor lead revealed he’s returned to his native Indiana to figure out the next phase of his life after experiencing a bit of a “breakdown.” The 32-year-old explained:
“I am back in Indiana right now because of a breakdown, again, in my life where I’m going, ‘I don’t know what’s happening.’ I don’t know what this next season of life looks like for me.”
It’s sad to think about, but we guess that’s just the reality of a reality star who no longer has a reason to be on TV. (Ben went on TV to look for love, and he eventually found it with his fiancée, Jessica Clarke.)
The TV personality noted that his current emotional state has nothing to do with his relationship with Clarke, but said it stems from his existential crisis of sorts now that Bachelor Nation is focusing on newer contestants. He shared:
“I’m farther and farther removed from the show and then, at the same time, I need to figure out what my life’s gonna look like and what my legacy is going to be.”
Ben went on to confess the fleeting nature of fame has left him “at a low place,” explaining:
“It’s a really exciting season. The seasons are unfamiliar to me, but it’s also really hard because I’m at a low place. I don’t see myself as this thriving figure right now. I’m kind of lamenting and separating myself from a lot of things that I’ve held close.”
Sadly, Lauren Bushnell Lane’s ex revealed he’s “not good at experiencing joy right now” and “not good at celebrating things” either, which he said is probably due to his ego “playing tricks” on him.
And while he acknowledges that being a part of Bachelor Nation “might be the best thing that ever happened” to him, Higgins said he’s struggling to continue to be a relevant part of it. He told Sutter:
“I don’t know how to make it my purpose now. I don’t know what to do with it anymore. It’s not really a piece of me anymore. I can talk about it, I can share my experience about it but ultimately, I was just telling Jess this the other day, I was like, ‘I feel like my only role in the Bachelor now is to be there for the contestants that want me to be there for them.’”
Higgins confessed he now knows both “how good it feels when fame is just being poured all over you” and how “hard it feels when that’s ripped away from you and people move on and a new generation comes up through and you don’t even understand them.”
But it’s not all bad for Ben: he and Clarke purchased their first home together in Colorado last year, and are set to wed in November. And hey — even if his 15 minutes are up, at least he gets to keep the Instagram followers!
Jokes aside, we hope Ben figures things out and realizes that fame isn’t everything. After all, he found what he always claimed to be looking for in the first place: love!
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