My son took his own life and I've never felt more alone – I don't know what to do

DEAR DEIDRE: My lovely son took his own life a few months ago and I feel like I’ve lost everything. I am heartbroken and filled with regret.

I am his 55-year-old dad. My son was 25. He was a lovely young man – kind, funny and caring. Everyone who knew him liked him.

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There was never any sign he was feeling so low that he might kill himself.

Surely I should have seen the signs?

I feel so foggy and alone.

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How is it right that I carry on when his young life is over?

I don’t know where to turn and am not coping well.

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DEIDRE SAYS: No matter the circumstances, the bereaved always feel an element of guilt about the loved one who has died.

If suicide is involved, this emotion can be stronger.

Please understand this was not your fault. Painful as it is to acknowledge, it was 100 per cent your son’s decision to end his life.

Nothing will replace your son but you can learn to fill your life with other interests and loves.


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Talk to the Compassionate Friends, a group of and for bereaved parents who can offer help and advice.

It has a special group for the parents of children who took their own life (, 0345 123 2304).

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